In his inspiring book, Quitter, Jon Acuff discusses an observation he’s made. Jon has talked with many people who say things like, “I’m a teacher, but I really want to paint.” He identified a trend in people who aren’t following their dreams. Many say, “I am a ____, but I really want to ____.” They feel stuck, scared, or don’t know how to chase their dreams. They continue showing up to work, miserable, unengaged, longing for something to change.
I have a confession to make: sometimes I don’t feel like doing the things that need to get done. Maybe I’m alone in this, but my hunch is that some of you fight the same battles I do.
Most often when this happens to me, I feel drained, like my energy is waning. This is one reason we see a lot of energy boosting substances out there (5-hour Energy, Monster, Cliff Energy Bloks, etc.). I’m not opposed to some of these; however, I don’t want to depend on them to meet life’s demands. The truth is that some of us struggle to find the energy we need to do what needs doing.
In training and coaching leaders, I invariably get pulled into a discussion about entitlement. “Millennials…” and “Kids these days…” Some even claim it is a societal issue. I can’t really disagree as 1st graders are handed trophies they can barely carry to the car after finishing last in the town soccer league. So, what can we do about it? What kind of example are we setting for those we lead and influence? Could gratitude be the answer? If so, we’ll gain much more than grateful attitudes around the office and dinner table.
Stress abounds in today’s culture. We think it’s normal. For people who seem constantly stressed, we don’t know how to regulate it very well. Author of Why Zebras Don’t Get Ulcers, Dr. Robert Sapolsky, suggests people today are constantly activating their fight or flight (i.e. stress) response. This is why both performance and health suffer.
Why is that some people strive to reach their potentials and others don’t? Why do some of us seek out challenges and others shy away? Why do some of us accept feedback more readily than others? Why are some people primarily motivated by recognition and others by learning? All of this, and much more, can be tied to our mindsets.
Vacations are quickly becoming a thing of the past. Americans get less annual vacation time (14 days) than many other countries, according to Expedia.com. The French, for example get about 38 days per year to get away.
According to John de Graaf of Take Back Your Time, 137 countries make paid vacation mandatory; the United States isn’t one of them. To top it all off, over 30% of Americans don’t use all their annual vacation days, leaving about 3 days on the table each year.
Are you getting enough sleep? How long have you been getting less than your optimal amount of sleep and blaming it on being busy? Do you think your performance isn’t effected by your lack of sleep?
On the whole, people in the America today don’t get enough sleep. Dr. Daniel Amen, author of Making a Good Brain Great, notes the hours for an average night’s sleep have plummeted. At the turn of the 20th century, Americans got 9 hours of sleep, on average. In 1975, they averaged 7 and a half. By 2008, an average night’s sleep plunged to 6 hours!
Why aren’t more people optimistic? Optimism may be the ticket to being happier, healthier and more successful. Who doesn’t want that?
Honestly, optimism often gets a bad rap. Many people see optimism as looking at the glass half full or seeing the world through rose-colored glasses. That’s not necessarily the case.
Carpe Diam, seize the day, is one of my favorite adages. It is a value I hold, something to aspire to. This attitude begins first thing in the morning. I believe that how we start our day has a direct correlation with the value in the rest of our day. Thus, being intentional to develop a powerful morning routine is essential.
How do you respond when your spouse, friend or family asks, “How was your day?” If you are like most people, it is all too easy to unload the various frustrations, injustices and wrongs you encountered. We tend to do this rather than highlight the good experiences from our day. Some term this the negativity bias. Put simply, it is our natural tendency to focus on the bad instead of the good. We do this at work, at home, with our children and so on.
To be honest, the negativity bias isn’t all bad. This natural bias helps us detect and avoid danger. However, when we become overly focused on the bad (i.e. pessimism) at the exclusion of the good, it can lead to a host of concerns: